Mocking Me

I don't know where the feeling is coming from. Who is the culprit? Is it the legs? Is it the brain? Whatever it is, something keeps telling me I'm old, slow and unfit. That's not what it's supposed to be like. Running is fun. I occasionally still get that. Even after a shit run like today. Out on the road itself, though, I do struggle. There's always that little demon sitting on my shoulder, whispering into my ear how old I've become.

The watch tells me I'm actually making progress. Today's run was a little bit faster than last week, which had been a little bit faster than the week before. So I know I'm making progress. The watch doesn't lie. However, it doesn't feel like it.

I'm actually signed up for a marathon in 4 weeks' time. Months ago I put my name into the ballot for Berlin, which I had never run before. I didn't expect to be drawn, but I was. So now I have an entry. I don't really feel like running a marathon. I'm struggling with 10 mile runs. However, unless I get sick or an injury, I know full well that I'm going to run. That's just me. I don't know how to quit. Or when. And I know I'll get the marathon done just fine. Not in a fast time, not even by my modest standards, but I'll get along just fine. The muscles always know what to do, and there's always the little bit of magic happening when I pin a number to my shirt.

There's plenty of time. Four weeks is enough to get some fitness back. I'm not exactly starting at zero. I'll just have to try and remember that when I'm out on the road.

9 Aug

10.17 miles, 1:29:39, 8:48 pace, HR 143

10 Aug

4.55 miles, 36:11, 7:57 pace, HR 147

11 Aug

4.05 miles, 31:49, 7:51 pace, HR 150

12 Aug

7.67 miles, 1:11:16, 9:17 pace, HR 149

   Bray Head

13 Aug

4.5 miles, 37:23, 8:18 pace

14 Aug

10.25 miles, 1:27:18, 8:31 pace, HR 149